5 people you need to stop stressing about

Your Ex: There’s a reason they are called “exes” and not “currents”. They were in your life, now they’re not. End of story. Look at a tough break up as a chance to grow as a person, and be thankful for all the emotions you are feeling. At least you are feeling something, and that is beautiful.

Your “Best Friend”: Giving someone the label of “best friend” puts a lot of pressure on your interactions. Often times they will disappoint you. Just enjoy the friendship of this person, enjoy the good, leave the bad and get on with living.

Your Arch Nemesis: Everyone has a person that really grinds their gears. Perhaps they stabbed you in the back; maybe you just hated them from the start. Too often, we are forced to interact with this person in one capacity or another. Stop wasting your emotional energy on this person and redirect into bettering yourself. Through improving yourself you will be able to approach your nemesis in a healthy way.

Your Relationship: You really like/love this person. A lot. Sometimes you feel consumed by thinking about them. They are everything you think you want. And you are terrified. Nothing is a turn off like desperation, so stop stressing about your love interest and let things play out how they may. Even if things go horribly, you will have saved yourself a lot of mental anguish in the process.

Yourself: No one stresses you out more than yourself. Your faults, your quirks, your hopes, dreams, failures and successes can all be a source of stress. It is important to consider a larger idea when going through your day to day life: Am I doing what I need to be in order to be happy? I'm just saying.

The Rubber Band Theory

You’ve probably heard of the book, Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus by John Gray. I read the book a few months ago and while I thought a lot of it was a bunch of hooey, there is still one concept that I’ve carried with me ever since reading it.

It’s called the Rubber Band Theory. It plays on the idea that like a rubber band, the man will start to want his space and pull back. Instead of chasing after him, the woman should let him have his space, and maybe even pull back a bit herself. With this space comes tension, just like you would see when you pull a rubber band in two separate directions. But the further you pull the rubber band apart, the more strongly it will come together creating an even closer relationship.

At first I thought this was an odd concept. Why would you want to pull away? But then I realized, the opposite of pulling away is when you cling on and seek even more attention=not good. There’s probably nothing more annoying to a guy when a girl is at his beckoning call, waiting, practically begging for his attention. Being a little mysterious, or better yet, being independent is much more attractive than being a girl who has nothing better with her time than to sit around and wait for some of his attention.

It’s not always easy to live like this but I think our relationships will ultimately be happier when we’re not so dependent. Our happiness shouldn’t have to come from our partner–it should come from within. Now hopefully I can take my own medicine!

Let them wear pink: An open letter to Olympics pundits

Mary Lou Retton, 1984

Dear sports geeks, commentators, politicians, gym rats and couch potatoes alike:

It doesn’t matter what colors the Olympians wear.

You’ve probably seen or read the “backlash” against 16-year-old American medalist Gabby Douglas, who wore—gasp! A pink leotard in her last Olympic appearance.

“It’s not patriotic!”

Excuse me, y’all. Gabby had already competed several times, wearing blue, red, and a whole pile of crystals. By the time she appeared in pink, she was surely a household name. Plus, she was competing individually, not with her team. So, let her wear pink.

Did anyone complain when swimmer Rebecca Soni wore a hot-pink suit as part of the U.S. women’s swim team?

Rebecca Soni

I don’t think so. And not that it mattered much, since those swimmers are so fast in the water you barely see their suits (which are mostly boring black).

You might argue that Olympic athletes should always wear their nations’ colors, and I won’t argue that an attractive color scheme is a nice addition to the proceedings. But look at Mary Lou at the top of this post. I wouldn’t say the American flag motif is that flattering, would you?

And what about our super-patriotic medal-receiving track suits?

Gabby Douglas on the podium. 

Don’t our athletes look so American in our steel-gray windbreakers, black pants, and neon sneakers? It just screams “USA,” right?

I didn’t think so. (Those Russian jackets are even worse, but that’s for a different battle.)

In order to make it to the Olympics, athletes train relentlessly and are pressured to operate not as ordinary humans, but as perfect machines. Opportunities to display personal style at the Olympics should be embraced. Uniform colors aren’t likely to make or break athletes’ performances.

Bring on the pink, Olympians. And the red, white, and blue. And even the neon green.

Go, Gabby!